There were times when I truly believed I was doing the right thing,
When lines blurred to a smog and time flew by like an unwritten song,
Where the trees could be of any shade and I wouldn’t have cared,
A sense of remorseful oblivion with distorted euphoria settled upon.
A blissful myriad of purposeless existence fuelled by lost passions,
Belief in a sense that didn’t even exist in other dimensions,
Multiplying feelings and dividing the players of the game,
That somehow seemed to end in never once a single winning.
The ones who set foot upon the very path that I myself tread upon,
Seem to face the dilemma of a meaningful existence just the same,
At every turn the throng grows thin and branches into realizations,
When the dawn’s light shines there is but one soul still untamed.
Every syllable that escapes the unflattering curves of my mouth,
Is accompanied by a pang in the uncensored and imaginative heart,
For nothing I say ever means anything less than what I feel,
How unfortunate for those whose ears play the listening part.
Humour and irony cloud the wounds that cut deeper than a knife,
If there was a simple truth it would be simply to state that words,
In all their glory and with all the power unknown to the universe,
They have the kind of weight that even a simple smile couldn’t deter.
Thought I had found a place to allow the feelings morose a refuge,
Thought there would be some respite from the mountain-sized ache,
It began with the inability to confront and ended with the same,
If I was a vampire I’d beg you to drive through my heart a stake.
I believed in unicorns and leprechauns and all things magical,
I believed that there was light at the end of the darkest of tunnels,
And when the dream faded into nightmares I had to stop believing,
That the magic only existed when falling prey to the happy pills.